Practicing emotional resilience
Having problems being productive working at home? Stressing over loved ones, bank accounts, rent/mortgage and other bills? Forced to finish the semester online and from home? Miss your gym, Happy Hours? Questioning if you’ve sanitized enough? Concerned about washing hands often and effectively? If you answered ‘yes’ to any of these questions, welcome to the new ‘Culture Club’!
Many of us are feeling this way and while we may have the time, we may not have found the best way to adapt to our new lifestyle. No one, but an occasional true pessimist, is predicting that this will last forever, but there are many potential scenarios about the length of the pandemic, social distancing and work-at-home. In the meantime, how do we positively deal with these “cultural changes”?
Two recent articles by Thomas Friedman started me thinking about the readjustment and cultural implications of the pandemic. In Dawn of a New Age[1], Friedman addresses the new historical divide: the world before COVID-19 and the world after. One question he raises is: “Will American culture or politics be fundamentally changed by this pandemic?” He proposes several influencing factors based on historical experiences. This is a complex question that validates our interest in preparing for a new culture – no matter what it is.
In his book The World is Flat (2004), Friedman discussed the growing global interconnectedness in 2004, and after 2004, all the connectivity tools surfaced (Facebook, Twitter, 4G, Skype, Big Data, iPhone), global trade and tourism exploded resulting in an “interdependent and in many ways - a fused” planet. Such interdependencies and cultural varieties create challenges in coordinating effective solutions to pandemic issues. It is clear, however, within our own national culture, the changes that we have had to make have created a reassessment of “shared values, attitudes and behaviors” (definition of culture) that can be addressed more productively with effective ‘cultural’ tools to ease the transition.
So, how does one adjust and adapt to a new cultural reality? There are many cultural adaptation tools, but one particular set of skills is a good place to start. Four skills comprise the Cross-Cultural Adaptability Inventory (CCAI)[2] that Real World Solutions, LLC uses to help clients in business, health care, education and community organizations work productively together across cultural differences. These skills are highly relevant to the lives of all individuals experiencing the pandemic crisis by helping us cope with the ever-changing cultural landscapes today, tomorrow and in the future. Here is a snapshot of how those skills can be positively applied to pandemic cultural change and the resultant ‘new normal’ cultures:
Skill set 1: Openness and Flexibility
This is the ability to be open to new ideas and ways of doing things; changing our ‘tried and true” approach to life and accepting, while being productive, new ways of working (at home) or studying online; going outdoors (but not in groups); working virtually or connecting on Skype, Zoom, or FaceTime/WhatsApp – as opposed to in-person meetings.
A note of concern for further discussion: in our era of mediated communication, interpersonal connection is already a challenge; a fear I have is that the change in culture will make ‘video/virtual interaction’ the norm, and we will give up on true interpersonal interaction. Hopefully this is not the case, but a red flag just the same.
While most people do a lot of shopping online, those who are used to taking time shopping at the grocery store will adapt by having a short list of items, wearing a mask and practicing the social distancing with hand sanitizer/gloves available. Those of us who used to go to the gym every day need to adjust with outside walks, avoid groups in-person and consider online interaction, e.g. church, medical questions, education, etc. Other simple, creative examples: I usually use my same coffee cup; now I change every day and now I really enjoy the variety! I walk the dog every day – but create a new route often to make things more interesting. These are just some ways of tailoring the adjustments to personal interest and enjoyment: trying something new and liking it.
And, there are more consequential changes that people will face: losing a business that they have spent years building and starting over; accepting that one will not be able to be at the hospital with a loved one; completing an academic semester online, to name a few. All of these involve flexibility – but also the second skill – emotional resilience.
Skill Set 2: Emotional Resilience
This is the ability to maintain a positive attitude and one’s self-confidence when having to change and try a new way of doing what you’ve always done well; the ability (and eventual satisfaction) of going from Plan A to Plan B, C, or Z – and making it work.
An example: I recently attended an online talk by Terri O’Hara at Animalwize who discussed the impact of pandemic on animal behaviors and emotions. Her advice to us (and therefore help to our animals) included personal “calming techniques” to mitigate stress; planning ahead for pet arrangements if necessary; and thinking about ways to balance our interaction with animals as well as the earth.
Dealing with home-boundness is challenging but I’ve found some newness in old items at home, (using what I had saved for a ‘rainy day’ because I realized ‘today’ was better). Therefore, I have been able to ‘tidy up’ more effectively and have actually found ways to get rid of items no longer needed which helps productivity (and space).
Each of us can work on finding new ways to deal with the stress and become more resilient to negative emotions. This is a major area of concern – especially when the current situation goes rapidly beyond just mitigation of stress and dealing with personal discomfort; our concerns can extend to preventing the social and personal effects of isolation, and the necessity of accepting a complete loss of one’s previous life, and having to rebuild a new one.
Skill Set 3: Perceptual Acuity
This skill set of being observant, empathetic and self-aware helps with cultural transition in many ways. Observation of social distance is critical to health and safety. To recognize and follow the spacing necessary to stop virus transmission, is not something we do automatically. Therefore, we need to focus and remember to do this.
Empathy - The media brings attention to the need to help health care workers, first responders, the elderly and those at risk, and this empathetic concern has been met by many efforts on the part of organizations and individuals to do their part to support and help those in need. Practicing empathy helps us with stress and makes us feel that we can make even a small difference in someone’s life and therefore, in our community. Empathy from others is important so that we all don’t feel alone in times of crisis, in spite of solitary situations.
Practicing perceptual acuity through empathy
Self-awareness – This is critical as we have to be self-aware of social distance, or whether we are following health guidelines properly (constantly checking the updated procedures and following accordingly)[3]. And, as we “stay at home” with family members, the stress can be overwhelming and we need to share our frustration carefully to avoid creating concern, discomfort and division. This skill set involves the issue of perception versus reality – especially when it comes to perceived versus actual risk. One’s self-awareness should measure the risk of contracting the virus and the rise of serious or dire consequences should one contract the virus. Perceptual acuity (reasonable assessment of perception) would also help in mitigating stress and providing stronger emotional resilience, i.e., the realistic chances of contracting the virus and put your actions in a realistic perspective.
Skill Set 4: Personal Autonomy
This skill set helps one maintain a personal/cultural ‘bottom line’ to recognize and maintain our own personal values and beliefs, and maybe even rediscover who we ‘can be’ or ‘should be’ in the face of pandemic challenges. There may be depth and parts of you that have been ‘hidden’ or unknown, only to be revealed in times like this. We take responsibility for our actions, do our part, help others as we can, and keep ourselves safe and prepared for a new future and culture.
Practicing personal autonomy
How do we accomplish this? Try these examples and develop your own agenda for action:
Flexibility/openness - Try a new way of doing things. Keep a daily schedule with outcomes and tasks to address the outcomes.
Emotional Resilience – Have a plan, but realize that plans might have to be changed, and address the changes with positivity and dedication to overcoming the challenges.
Perceptual Acuity – Be aware of your own and others’ social distance; share your insight and support as appropriate and helpful, without stressing your own personal, professional or family limits; be self-aware of your stress and emotions and be open to others’ reactions and needs.
Personal Autonomy - Know your personal, professional and family limits and “bottom lines” and respectfully ensure they are addressed.
And, what about society in general? How do we – and our disparate groups, political parties, special interests, companies/corporations, non-profits, healthcare organizations, etc. learn to work together under a new ‘cultural framework’? Recognizing that the pandemic affects ethnicities, developing and marginalized communities differently and thereby creating even more inequity, how can we all contribute to helping those populations? In a second article A Plan to Get America back to work [4], Friedman discusses three goals of saving as many lives as we can, making sure our medical system doesn't get overwhelmed, and in this process, not destroy the economy and therefore, people’s lives. While these goals are appropriate, the methods to address them must consider the cultural change that the people, systems and economy are going through that will result in a “new culture”. Proactive efforts to prepare for the changed culture will need to be done collaboratively and with input on all sides. ‘Building bridges’ is the focus, not creating walls. Cultural awareness and tools will be required.
Stay tuned – for more thoughts and suggestions about positive cultural change for effective and productive personal, professional and social implications.
-Melinda L. Cain, Ph.D., Managing Director and Greg Bowlin, Strategist and Business Advisor
Real World Solutions, LLC
[1] “Dawn of a New Age”, by Thomas L. Friedman, New York Times, 3/17/2020.
[2] CCAI: Cross-Cultural Adaptability Inventory, by Colleen Kelley, Ph.D. and Judith Meyers, Psy.D. http://www.drjudithmeyers.com/ccaihome.html
[3] An insightful, concise and legitimate YouTube with Dr. Fauci can be found at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8A3jiM2FNR8&feature=youtu.be
[4] “A Plan to get America back to work”, Thomas L. Friedman, New York Times, 3/22/2020
